Positive Psychology’s approach to happiness is indeed my favorite approach because it is the most balanced approach, which not only accepts that fact that happiness is a very subjective concept but also takes in consideration the fact that extremes are never a good thing. However, one can also argue that extremes are opposites and opposites are a necessity in our lives. Indeed they are. Without opposites we would never be able to distinguish right from wrong. We would never appreciate the warm sunny days, we will take the nice weather for granted if we would never experience the cold winter weather.
Unfortunately, we get used to everything that happens to us, either good or bad, because this is our natural ability that we are blessed with. Our bodies get used to the sensations we feel when we are constantly exposed to the same stimulus. This ability of getting used to sensations is the most precious gift we have since it gives us means to adapt and survive in any kind of situation. However, this ability is also a curse because as we get used to things we start taking things for granted, like we take our own home planet for granted for example. We take it for granted the fact that earth provides for us the most important thing in our entire existence, a ground to stand on.
So, opposites are a necessity it seems, and getting used to things is good and bad, and if we continue to argue like this, then we can easily conclude that opposites are good and so are the villains. But if villains exist then superheroes exist, and if superheroes exist then someone must be in trouble and must need to be saved. If someone is in trouble and needs to be saved then this someone is neither a hero nor a villain. Are you with me so far? OK, but now here is the problem: Who decides about someone being the hero, another one being the villain and the other one being the victim? This seems to be our main problem my friends, who decides about the script?
We always accepted our roles without questioning our positions or the script we are put to play in the game of life. We do not ask or question our positions for many reasons, and first of all because from the moment we are born we feel vulnerable and we trust someone else to take care of our most basic needs, like being fed, dressed, and taken care off. From that moment we form a dependency, the need to feel physically and emotionally attached to someone in order to feel loved and content with existence. This dependency or the need for attachment is not a bad thing but it can be used to our disadvantage at any point while we feel vulnerable and too weak to make decisions on our own.
The benefits that derive from this need of attachment are obvious, and anyone can understand that when we as humans feel vulnerable this is the very key to feeling love and needing love. This way we learn to need others and allow them in our lives and this is how we learn to play along, get along with one another and form successful teams. On the other hand, because we are vulnerable at early stages in life we could in fact be indoctrinated and misled to believe in all sorts of the wrong things including believing in a fiction character that watches over our shoulders in order to judge us. It is because we are vulnerable and weak that we immediately assume that our role is to obey and not question what we are told that is true. Hence, we do not question our scripts that we are put to play, which we call destinies but that in fact have nothing to do with our true destinies.
I was put in the role of the victim in this life, not by my choice. I questioned the position I was put in by asking ongoing questioning that at some point challenged my parents and other adults’ authorities when I received answers like, “Oh well, this is life,” or, “Life sucks when you are little,” or “Better a piece of shit than being little don’t you know that? The big fish eats the small fish,” and so on. Right from the beginning I learned that no one was able to explain things to me by using any reasoning that could make sense, but instead they used either power as a result of their age demanding to be served as well as to be respected, or used their superiority due to power and control over the weaker vulnerable beings, or used the advantage of their physical stature to intimidate me and show me my position that I never willingly accepted. I used to huff and puff under my breath and sometimes I even dared to refuse saying sorry to my mom, until a good slap made me come to my senses and taught me who was truly in charge. Since logical explanation was lacking and physical or emotional pain was used to show me my position and to accept it, I then made it my goal to search for the purpose of my existence using logic not an arbitrary lower and vulnerable position others put me to.
I bet there are others like me out there that are reading this post now and are nodding their heads saying, “I also questioned my role and the script I was put to play in this life, because for me too, things felt differently inside of my mind and my heart from what the society was teaching me or forcing me to comply into.” If you felt the same way then welcome to the club, the club of those who use their reasoning to make sense of things. Thank goodness. But do not get me wrong; I do not form secret clubs, nor do I organize forums, and especially I do not need followers to praise me and make me feel important. If you feel the same way I do, and question things in the same way, then keep doing what you are doing and stay safe by being smart, by questioning things and by not believing in any of the stories told and retold via video games, movies, and popular books.
For those who are not put in the role of a victim like myself, but instead are put in the role of a hero, then you my friend have a very hard decision to make. You are being fooled in believing that you are precious, genius, so valuable that no one can take your place in being a hero that people need. You are fooled into believing that you are special, that others need you, that you must do your duty to save earth from itself and from its vulnerable people. You are told that you are the only hope, and so on and so on. You may have heard voices in your head (that is not a good sign believe me, seek professional help at that point) or you may have seen signs that can be interpreted in whatever way want but you took them seriously and took them as signs that speak directly to you and that God really wants you to fulfill your destiny by saving some people from a real or even imaginary enemies. When someone’s ego is pumped so much to the point of believing that one is very important and his heroic actions to save others are needed, then such hero will start feeling very good about his/her own existence . Hence, this one little hero in training will do anything, and I mean anything, to keep this energy flowing, to keep feeling good about being needed to save others by using his special skills or talents. These people are those who their approach to happiness is a Eudaimonic kind. Without a purpose for their existence they feel useless, especially after they were already appraised a lot for being a special kind of hero, and as they got used to that special treatment and feeling, they would want more of that all the time. I call this the Law of Acceleration in my book The 12 Laws that Define a Human.
You my hero friend, if you truly belong in this category, you are a victim too but you do not know it yet. However, if you do some research you will find out that many others like you have been in the same position before but in the end they tasted the bitterness of left down and betrayed, cheated on their perfect plans of rescuing the princess from the dragon’s claws. Believe me that princess you wanted to save, was indeed saved the moment she was shown what it really means to being a human. That princess is no longer a princess; she transformed into a queen the moment a boy showed her how it really feels to be loved by a human. She loved being loved no matter how vulnerable and dangerous her position as a victim was. She loved loving a human and being a human.
So, if one simple girl learned that is nothing wrong with being vulnerable, nothing wrong with not being so perfect, and if this one girl that was so hard to please learned to appreciate life and love from the position of a victim then you my hero friend can do it too, and this will be your heroic act; fighting against your own ego and your own need to feel needed and appraised. Take some time for yourself, rest for a bit and enjoy life instead; life down to earth, as a human being while allowing yourself to be loved not because you are a hero, but because you are a vulnerable human, full of passion and intense emotions. Allow yourself to feel the love instead of the pride because love always feels good; it actually feels better than being right or proud for your powers.
I hate to say it but someone who convinced the hero characters that these heroes are special and they need to save the vulnerable humans like myself for example, that thing was lying. Do you want to test that thingy, that suspicious energy, the whispers of that entity, or archetype, whatever name you may know it by? Then ask for clear and face to face communication, ask for facts that make sense not the made up facts that only make one assume that there is something suspicious going on. Ask for clear communication of the facts, not signs that can be interpreted either way. And even if facts are shown to you or it feels like that, then ask again. Ask a different question this time. Ask, what if?
Indeed I did the same thing and I found out that when I asked “What if? What if I am played to believe that I need rescuing? What if the hero who acts as if he will save me is in fact the one who created all my troubles so that I would find myself in a vulnerable position where I cannot refuse his help?” I found out that I was right on my assumptions.
It is important for those that suffer from the superhero syndrome to ask themselves the following questions: When you really were in trouble at some point, did this entity show up and saved you in any situation at all? Did you believe that in such situations where you needed help and asked for help but help did not arrive, you later assumed that it was a test of testing your faith and your commitment to such godlike entity? Is he or she or it very evasive, eluding, secretive? Is he, she or it making you doubt yourself, your conclusions? Is he, she or it making you believe that you are on the right track by following certain signs but then, when things go wrong, you doubt your conclusions and this makes you feel stupid, and guilty and blaming yourself for misreading the signs? Then there you have it my hero friend. You are a hero indeed for surviving the mind games of this trickster until now. You are the one who needs help and needs saving. You need to save yourself from such entity because such entity can never compare to God. If god truly is omnipotent then god does not need appraising, or testing your commitment. If they indoctrinated you into believing that when your prayers were not answers it was a little test of your faith then you are being fooled. No good teacher ever tests their students without teaching them the lesson first. No god would ever hide and ask you to believe in him or her or it blindly to test your faith. If such “godlike” entity does that to you, asking for blind and unquestionable obedience and authority over you then such entity is only testing your intelligence and ability to think on your own. If you are gullible enough to believe that this was a test of your faith then congratulations, you past the test for being stupid and becoming a tool on this entity’s hands (claws).
We all at some point were stupid and vulnerable, from the moment we were born and that is why this “godlike” entity took advantage of human race. But no matter how many tests we past or failed in the past, the future is still ahead of us, and we can change the outcomes for that future that is coming and make ourselves useful to life on earth. We can change the future outcomes, starting from now and instead of praising the deity coming from the sky or water or from the underground to save us from one another because we wrongfully accepted to play the roles that they assigned to us of villains, heroes and victims we can play the role of those who are smart enough to understand their game and how this game ends if we decide to take a side. We can stop all that madness by stop being their puppets and playing their scripts. We can decide for ourselves what feels right or wrong, because right there in middle of our guts we can feel the love for the other human being, and this love feeling is stronger than the feeling of being right, or perfect, or proud or in control. The love for another human feels better because it gives us the right motivation and the right reason to continue our existence, and this motivation and reason is the fact that another human being needs us and love us, and wants us to be, just be there for them. Can we not do such simple thing? Be there for one another to love and be loved? If not then how can you call yourself a human?
In regards to the question whether we need opposites in our lives and therefore we may need good and bad, villains and heroes, I find there is a flaw in this logic and here is why: We do need opposites but these opposites must occur naturally and we do not need to force the good and the bad, or to share the roles among us. Roles we partake to play at some point in life must come naturally based on circumstances that cannot otherwise been avoided. These roles must not be forced by artificially dividing roles and projecting scripts and then enforcing these scripts through media, social media, internet, commercials, markets, politics, trades, religions and dogmas, and so on. Anything that is forced is unnatural, and if it is unnatural then it is not the true destiny, and whoever we think is our enemy is not, and whoever we thought was our friend it may not. Hence, we would be very chaotic in our decisions and actions, and at that point we ourselves created new problems to which the “godlike” sociopath entity will come or maybe not to rescue us from ourselves.
So opposites always exist but they will occur naturally. When we are forced to make a choice or take stand between the two opposite sides that were artificially created then we are forced to accept dualism. Dualism is nothing like opposites. The true face of dualism is like the face of Medusa, beautiful in one instant and full of snakes on the other, without any reason or explanations as why that occurred, because it was artificially created. Dualism is also like a patient with bipolar disorder that you never know when it is going to snap at you. Dualism has no reason, opposites have a reason to exist. Opposites make sense when they occur and anyone can see the point for such occurrences, but dualism is never explained. Dualism is only accepted because it masks itself as opposites, and since opposites are needed then someone will wrongly assume that dualism is also needed. To explain the dualism better let me use the story of batman as an example. The story of Batman is the story of a superhero that never smiles and never allows anyone in his life, and by comparing his character with that of the joker, they seem like two opposites. But could this be a manifestation of dualism instead of opposites. Could it be that Batman and the Joker are indeed the same person but that is why he always wears a mask in whichever role he chooses to play? If so, then this could indicate that Batman suffers from Bipolar Personality Disorder that unfortunately forces him to play both roles, that of the villain and that of the hero. I would say, let’s be very careful from people who show such extreme mood swings, and let’s not believe in scripts others write for us. Let’s follow what and how we feel inside our hearts when we first use our reasoning to question signs and secret knowledge, and question everything that is shared through media, movies, shows, games or popular books by asking, What if the hero that wants to save us is in fact the villain himself?