I am so bad, so bad at telling people apart. All my students look the same to me sometimes, unless they start talking to me; and even my neighbors, I say hi to everyone with such an enthusiastic smile and I forget that I never actually met them before. That’s because the only way I can tell people apart is the energy they vibrate.
This is also the reason why I often seem as if I have trust issues, because how can I trust my eyes? Even wearing these big eyeglasses is not helping…LOL.
Nevertheless, I can trust my gut’s feelings, because the moment someone starts talking to me I observe everything they say or do with different kinds of eyes. I see them with the eyes of my mind and of my reasoning. It is called Emotional intelligence (EI not AI).
When someone starts talking to me, and I am close enough to them so that I can feel the energy they vibrate, at that moment, their movements, gestures, words, or tone of voice, anything that the person uses to communicate with me which needs energy to produce these actions, tells me a lot more about that person. That’s the energy I should trust, and it has always been right so far trusting it, which I did no call it vibe or gut feeling. I called it reasoning, because to me clearly that was what I was doing, but with the speed of light. I trusted this man for example, that I met years ago. I trusted that he sincerely loved me and he did and I was right. I trusted that if I would have seen him one more time as he wished, we would have both been in big trouble, and again I was right about it. I trusted this feeling that comes from energy when I thought I was in danger and I had to run away from someone or something, and I was right. I trusted my judgment when others told me that they were victims of a certain story, but in fact I felt inside my brain that they were lying to me, and that I was the victim instead. I did that by analyzing all the facts that were served to me, and even though the facts seemed right and legit, yet, the way they were served did not make sense; it did not have a valid reason. I used EI not AI. That’s what makes me a survivor.
In other words, energy does not lie, and I know how to fully trust it now. I am not afraid anymore that I may make mistakes in my judgment of who is the lair or who is the true lover; who has all the good intentions and who does not. All I need is to meet these people face to face and I can tell them apart of who is who. The moment someone is in front of me and starts talking to me, I can learn more about them in just 5 minutes, which can undo all the stories and impressions they may have tried so hard to make me believe for years sometimes, either through letters, emails, songs, pictures, or other clues left occasionally here and there. When I followed those clues before, thinking I was following my reasoning, I was always fooled and led ashtray. I finally learned my lesson. So let them come these people to me now; let them stand in front of me, and let them engage in conversations with me, and I can read them all, inside out. And again, they may never know that I learned so much about them in just five minutes conversation, until it hits them later.
People are often surprised at how come they could not fool me when their plan was so perfect, and I can tell them that I am not fooled by perfection, I look for reasons behind such perfection or imperfection. I look for real, and if real does not fit, or does not make sense, then I know it is all fake what they try to serve me.
I often tell people I meet for the first time, the same thing I tell my students before a test, “Don’t be fooled by my looks. Don’t think that just because I seem distracted, I really am, because quite in contrary, I observe everything, but I let people think I have not.” I also warn them about the possible mistakes they may make on their judgment of me based on my looks. To some I may seem timid, to others I may seem, bold, strong, or even a mean person, almost unapproachable. I let these people believe whatever they want to believe, but just to make sure that they are real fools, and to be fair with them, I give them warnings, and sometimes hundreds of warnings. I even advice them that they must not be fooled into thinking that they can fool me, just because I look so vulnerable, or silly, or foolish sometimes. I tell others that I am a lot more than they may judge me to be based on my looks or how I act in front of them, which has always been just a strategy that I often used by making others comfortable, thinking I knew nothing about their intentions. A strategy that made them think that I was fooled by them. It’s called a survival strategy, you fools. And even though after so many warnings, these fools still believed they could fool me? Well then, there are only two reasons why someone would continue to believe such thing: 1) this person is evil, had bad intentions, or is involved in so much wrong doings against me that is now afraid if such things come out in the open, 2) this person truly is a fool because even after so many warnings and so much honesty on my side, the fool still believes he/she can fool me, then there is nothing else left to say but that these are the Fools and they deserve that title. Happy April’s Fool day.