The battle between two extremes has long been the only way to accept one’s existence; left or right, up or down, fake or real, but only one choice to make. Which one would you accept? People were divided in choosing sides, nations too were divided, gods among them were divided as well. And this division is a necessity of life so one would take notice of the other, like day and night, front and back, death and life. Question is, how can someone be happy by choosing death? Obviously life will win, people want to choose life, they want to live forever and become immortal even, like gods. Gods themselves never chose death, because life is more luring, right? Well, maybe is not so, maybe death sometimes is a necessity, like death in nature for example. Maybe death was a choice for some gods too, who knows, because where are they now? Death is also a choice for humans too sometimes when life becomes so unbearable to handle. Tragedy is not an invention of Greek gods then.
Looking into the studies of Greek Mythology, I found that tragedy as in theaters was created to produce emotions so that one would go through those emotions and experience the extremes of those human emotions without necessarily experiencing the tragedy itself. The spectators need the tragedy, just like they need the comedy, not only for the emotions but also for the experience and lessons that come from it. However, life itself is not a play, because human is the actor and gods are the spectators. Hence, we do not just express those emotions, we feel them, we do not just interpret life, we live it. But gods? According to Greek Mythology, they did not choose to be the player, they were satisfied to be the spectator, and also the narrators. Then the question became, are gods like God? Do they have in their hands our destiny? Well, we all know that gods cannot be God. Gods are plural and God is one, singular being. Yet, we question is God a being, as in a separate being outside of us or are we part of God? No one can tell for sure, and all that we can say and agree upon might as well be just speculations. But we know that gods are different from God, and that is all we know for sure.
So the question after question may pop in our minds right now as we go down this road to explore the reason for the existence of extremes and how to bring peace between them so that their existence is still recognized. As Roberto Calasso puts it in his book The Marriage of Cadamus and Harmony, where he doesn’t just expose everything known about Greek gods and heroes of Greek Mythology, but he also analyses in details the necessity of each story told about them, and how they become connected to one another, he says, mystery is a mystery is not a problem. A problem has a solution and when you find the solution then the problem itself is gone. Mystery, being not a problem, does not have a solution; mystery has answers, but even those answers are mysteries on their own. As such, we move one level up each time we are getting closer to understanding the mystery, rather than solving it. We getting one level up in our consciousness, our understanding about matters of life and so on, but we do not resolve them, because in the mysteries of life there isn’t anything to be resolved, there is only a need to understand.
I am concerned with knowing and understanding, and this has always been one of my drivers, and sometimes the only passion in life. Since I was young I would sit somewhere and observe other people in silence. I would see how they acted, their gestures, facial expressions, capturing fragments of their conversations, noticing the tone of voice and then making up a story behind of what I have seen. I wasn’t satisfied with just watching others, I was satisfied only if I reached the point where I understood why they were behaving that way, were they happy or were they faking it? Is there love or is there just lust? Are people destined to mate and marry one another, or are people destined to fall in love but never be together?
Life has proven so many times that people fall in love but love fades at some point, it becomes normal. One time, this man I was dating, which later became my husband, asked me what I feared the most in a relationship. I answered, I fear to reach the point in a relationship where I am taken for granted. And it happened with the second marriage as it happened with my previous one. And even though I knew that there was no love right from the beginning of each of my relationships, because they were agreements on needs that needed to be fulfilled if one has to live on earth and among humans, therefore, I was not expecting to feel hurt if indeed I were to be taken for granted, yet it happened. We feel hurt when we are taken for granted because that point marks the beginning of your nonexistence. Unfortunately, as things are arranged at this point, we cannot avoid this routine of getting used to the beauty and the beast of our existence. And so, the more we stay together the more we get used to one another, and as human as we are, we are made to adapt. We adapt to feelings, we adapt to the intensity of the light in the room or darkness for that matter, we adapt to bad smells or good smells, we adapt to touch, taste, we adapt to feeling loved or abused, just the same, and so we reach the point where we would need more, and more and more, so we can feel alive again, feel the excitement of love or of falling in love. Cruel isn’t it?
It seems that love is destined to fail right from the beginning of it, love is designed to hurt, because where is the beginning there is also an end. And that’s what Greek gods feared the most, the end. They knew the end was to come at some point, just as the end of Titans was the beginning of gods, and the end of primordial deities was the beginning of Titans. This brought me to explore more about destiny and fate, what is destined to be unchanged like the trajectory of a planet, which can never be changed unless a violent force is applied, and what can indeed be changed. Now we know that when a violent force needs to be applied to change things then we are doing the one thing we should never do, forcing to change what was destined to not change. We may be aware by now that to change one’s destiny or one planet’s trajectory is a violent event that will definitely affect the whole balance of cosmos. It is this knowledge about destiny, this truth that Uranus told his son Kronos. It is this the curse that terrified Kronos all his life, that one day he was destined to be killed by his own son. It is not the karma then, it is the destiny that things must remain in equilibrium because when the balanced is tipped over to one extreme more than the other, the change is inevitable.
To me, destiny seemed so easy to understand, but fate was still a mystery. Fate, according to Greek Mythology can be bent, broken even, changed. One can do this with the help of gods. I questioned at this point, were gods finding a way to make themselves stay in the loop forever, by giving themselves some important roles in humans lives, so we would not dare kill them like Kronos did to his father, and Zeus did to Kronos? This is a mystery, one can say, but may be it is not. I set myself on a journey to find out the truth, because finding the truth excites me more than life itself. I was reading The Lost Book of Enki, by Zecharia Stichin, last year, and right from the beginning the same question is asked, what is the difference between NAM-a Destiny and NAM.TAR-fate a destiny that can be bent, broken, changed. Now this question may not have been answered in a way we wanted it to be, as a problem rather than a mystery. We can still find some answers but still have some more questions. In this book, the author Zecharia Stichin, declares to have found and translated some old tablets, from some old archaeological sites. He indeed wrote a series of books about his discoveries which I have read most of them, but this book was the one that intrigued me the most, and I kept it beside my bed for a long, long time. I even referred to it like one would refer to bible or another holy book. I would go back and see what did Enki write about this or that event, this or that behavior. I would do this because, as I mentioned earlier, we feel like the events keep repeating in our lives, as they were in the previous lives in the stories that are told generations after generations. I did that because I wanted to find out if this really is a loop created by gods to make themselves live forever as to avoid their ending or not. Was this a smart move on Zeus’ end or was this a mistake?
For those who do not know who Enki was I would like to quickly explain here that Enki and Enlil were two brothers (or half-brothers) who came to Earth from Nibiru, a planet far away from earth. When they arrived here they started a new life, which was somehow resembling and paralleling the major events just like life in Nibiru went through. Historical events and battles became inevitable; their half-sister Ninmah was the promised bride to one of the brothers but she fell in love with the other one. And so the story repeats itself. It is always two rivals for one prize. Was this what really happened in Nibiru? Then why the events had to repeat here on Earth too? Didn’t these two brothers and their sister learn their lessons already? Nibiru, according to these tablets, had already reached an advanced level of governing life and resources, then why would the same story repeat again? Were they set in a trap? Were these three Enki, Enlil and Ninmah the delicious source of emotions for the Greek gods, right from the moment they set their foot on earth? The tablets, these archaeological discoveries also tell us that it was the cooperation between Ninmah and Enki that life on earth was created and humans became to be the new being roaming earth. At this point, one cannot help it but ask, were humans somehow the new meat, the source of delicious emotions for the alien gods from Nibiru, just as the Nibiru’s beings were for other gods, or vice versa? Did humans or at least some of the humans managed to get out of that loop and instead of being the abused become the abuser? I questioned all these because I read a lot of books, and the more you read, the more you discover, and the more you discover the more you question. Then definitely we are dealing with one mystery after another. And I did not mind, going on and on, and discovering more and more, because that is my passion.
So, my dear friend who is reading this post, I came to realize that I myself repeat the same stories as the characters in the books I am reading, and in fact if you are careful enough and read as much as I do, you too will find out that you have repeated all those stories, maybe in small fragments, but you did experience the same emotions that these heroes, explorers, aliens, Greek gods themselves have experienced at some point. So how is that possible one would ask. Who are we? Are we them? Are we gods, are we humans, are we the aliens? We can be any of those, and this is not important, believe me. What is important to ask is this: What is behind the scenes? Who is writing the stories and can we write our own story? Are we dealing with destiny (NAM) or are we dealing with fate (NAM.TAR)? Once we answer these questions then we would know how to act. I am planning to answer them on my next post, but right now I have to stop writing as I have to get ready to face the real life and get to work, to teach my students about psychology and collective consciousness. However, I can tell you one thing right now, that our journey will continue with even more excitements…Stay tuned…