I am about to embark a new journey in my life. Each time, after I stumble and fall, I find myself growing even higher than before. I have came to realize that I must love my falls. I climb higher and fall harder but then I rise even higher and become stronger and stronger.
And this is where I stand now. I fell really hard this time. I almost lost everything important in my life. I almost lost the credibility to raise my own children and live in my own house which I bought with my own money, because my husband, my relatives, my beloved friends, my own mother accused me for being crazy. Why was I crazy? I was called crazy this time, with no medical proof, because I was crazy enough to believe in my own cause, and have my own principals by which I live my life. I was called crazy because I could no longer pretend that I agreed with Catholic Church and therefore I quit my well paid job with Catholic Board of education. And all these people in my life never understood me that my principals are more important to me, more important than money or what they think of me. However, my children are my life. I do not want to lose them and so I moderated my anger against all religions in the world, and I decided to continue to believe in my own principles and Laws which I have written in my book The Truth but without raising my voice too much so that my relatives, my husband and my mother can realize that I am not that crazy as to not control my anger or my fears. I do not follow causes to the point that I lose myself or what is dear to me but I will always continue to fight for the freedom to express my opinions on this matter without being labeled as crazy from people that do not even have any type of qualifications to call me so. Here are the two basic principles I follow in life, and you judge for yourself whether they were right to call me crazy or not:
1. God comes first and I am guided by God. I do not receive orders, do not see strange things or hear any voices in my head, but I know that I am guided when things too often happen in my life just as I am told in my dreams. This cannot be a coincidence. A coincidence does not last 40 years. Also I use my reasoning and logical interpretation of my dreams, and of the facts that I randomly come across during my life which again, I do not think is a coincidence but just a way my unconscious leads me too find my way. Therefore, believing that I am doing the right thing, I will not allow myself to be sidetracked by fear of being ridiculed by little people, with no capacity to judge my actions and no professional training to label me crazy. However, I will not risk losing what belongs to me, and losing myself in the process. I love living life to the fullest, enjoy each day as a new beginning and love having fun with my children, always concerned for their well-being.
2. I will always tell the truth. I will do my best and try to be as polite as possible as to not hurt anyone’s feeling but the truth, just as I know it, must always be told. And I do not think is anything wrong with that. I can express my opinions in my blog, and use some logical explanation to prove my points, just like others can do the same and I will not call them names or start any fights and arguments but I can use some critical thinking, we can all use some critical thinking to discuss the matters and find the truth, the real picture of the puzzle that God wants us to solve without hurting one another and dismissing each other’s ideas and opinions. Maybe some of us will be wrong in this long process, but let’s me nice and sensitive to each other’s feelings and let’s consider this as brainstorming stage, so not to take things too personally either.
Well, you see, this is what this blog is about, and I will continue to express my honest opinion on matters of life, love, religion, God, human souls, destiny and reincarnation. I do believe in reincarnation, and believe that Jesus was human, and his lessons were very important indeed, and that is what matters the most not his bloodline or his divine soul. And such, Jesus may very well be reincarnated and it could be any of us, you me, him, her, or anyone else who feels inspired to teach his teachings. For this my friend I was called crazy by some incompetent people, but it hurt me because they were my family, and my closed friends at that time. I lost them and their support, but I am making new friends and new family in the process, and I still have my own children beside me day and night. And that’s all that matters to me for now.